Momma's Got A Boyfriend

It's kind of funny how smart kids are.  You can try and sneak around behind their back, or be nonchalant about something, but they can read grown-ups like a book.  Sitting in the car yesterday with B and kiddo on the way to get snow cones, kiddo began singing "Momma's got a boyfriend, momma's got a boyfriend."  My face flushed red and I laughed nervously...because truly, honestly...I'm not sure if I do or not.

It's been a while since I've actually successfully dated.  It's something that I've actually been avoiding like the plague since kiddo was born, because a lot of guys my age are just not mature enough to handle dating a girl with a child.  They expect you to be able to drop whatever you're doing and go out for shots on a Wednesday night, or shoot, to be able to go out at all upon short notice.  Having a child means finding childcare, finding decent clothes that haven't been ruined by said child, and finding the energy to be perky and cute and talk about something other than iCarly for a few hours.  It was just something that I wasn't prepared to tackle...until B came along.

So, needless to say, I don't really understand all the nuances of dating just yet.  It's supposed to be like riding a bike, right?  Once you do it, you never just "lose" how.  Or, at least that's what I thought.  But I was horribly wrong.  Every date has been spectacular.  From the first dinner date where we sat and talked long after our waitress' shift had end and they'd locked the restaurant doors, to taking kiddo out (after several dates, just he and I...I am tough on who I let around the kiddo, after all) to the park, and earning her seal of approval after a trip to the custard shop. 

But here we are...two-ish months after that first date, and while we've spent evenings cuddled up on the couch playing games on his iPad, laid on the floor reading stupid books...we don't have a "title."  I guess it's not something I should be worried about, but I'd love to be able to call him something other than just "the guy I've been dating."  I want him to be my boyfriend.  I want to hold his hand and tell him stupid jokes that make him snort.  I want him to make me try more awful food (by the way, Thai is *not* a favorite.)  I know we can do all that WITHOUT the title, but something about making it "official" is something I long for so badly.  I want kiddo's song to be right, and I want to skip through the house like a dork and sing it myself at the top of my lungs.

I'll just wait it out, for now, though.  As much as I'd love those words of semi-commitment from him, I can be content with just being "the girl and guy who have been dating." 

But if I'm this bad now...I'm scared for my daughter when she comes to me for dating advice years down the road.

Maybe I'll just lock her in the room 'til she's forty.

A Man to Marry

I swear, the excitment with my child never stops.  She has the amazing ability to turn even those most bland of conversations into something worth texting my mom about.  A couple days ago, while out and about with B, the guy I've been dating the past several weeks (I guess he's not officially my boyfriend...I'm so inept at this whole dating situation that I can't say I'm 100% positive WHAT he is.) we stopped for frozen custard.  Of course, as soon as we walked in the doors, kiddo saw the poster on the wall with the pictures of all their delicious "signature" treats, immediately choosing the Dirt and Worms variety (Oreo cookies & gummi worms in vanilla custard) for herself, and picking out one for me, and one for B as well. 

Well, everything was going fairly normal (for us, at least...I can't say we're ever truly "normal") until we sat down in the booth with our custard and kiddo began talking about her daddy and her soon-to-be stepmom.  Her story about trying on flower girl dresses was quickly followed by a rather chipper, "My mommy really needs to find some guy to marry!" 

I felt my face flush red and I buried it in my hands, just laughing.  Of course, B, being the amazing sport he is laughed and asked her why and she responded that she "needs a stepdad."  Welp...at least she knows what she wants?

And the fact that B didn't get the deer-in-the-headlights look and flee from us when kiddo called him my boyfriend 17 times and put her flowery headband on his head, and then announced to him that I need to find a man to marry...well, that speaks pretty highly of him.

Five, Going on Twenty

I'm certain that every parent on this planet has had the "do as I say, not as I do," talk with their child.  I've known, since my child was born, that it was bound to happen.  The thing is, I didn't expect it to happen so soon.  But, of course, my child never ceases to amaze me, and as always, she threw me a real curveball in the car the other day...

"When I grow up, I'm going to have two kids - one girl and one boy.  But, I'm gonna make sure and have the girl before I get married!"

I'm sure my eyes were the size of saucers as the words came out of her mouth, and I stammered, trying to find the words to respond to her.

"Uhmm...why are you planning on having her before you get married, sweetie?"
"So that she can be my flower girl!"

I paused a moment and shook my head, quickly explaining to my wedding-minded child that you do not, in fact, need a child to be your flower girl.  I explained to her that most people will ask their cousins, neices, nephews, or even children of friends to be their flower girls.  She thought about it for a long moment before speaking again.

"But...you had me and  you aren't married."

Yep.  There it is.  I kind of had a feeling it was coming, as soon as I told her having a kid before getting married wasn't the best idea.  So, I began explaining to her that being a parent is very hard - and that being a single parent is even harder (and extremely expensive).  I thought I made a pretty good argument from my point, but she debunked it all with her next statement...

"Well mom, I'm almost 20!"

Six in the Air

It was in the car just last week that I came to the decision that I am not a fan of Rhianna.  Now, don't get me wrong, her songs are extremely catchy, and are some of the favorites in my shower-singing repertoire.  But, when my five year old daughter belted out a verse of her new whips-and-chains themed hit, my jaw hit the floor.

"SIX in the air..." she sang at the top of her lungs.  The ending of the song was quickly followed by a "Mommy, can we listen to that 'sticks and stones' song again?!"  I quickly responded that it was on the radio so I couldn't replay it, but was still in shock at what I'd just heard.

"Hey...what did you say was in the air in that song, again?"  "SIX!" she quickly retorted.  I breathed a sigh of relief, but then and there made the decision that when Miss Priss is in the car, I think we'll be sticking to CDs only...or maybe the Christian station.  All the six in the air is starting to get to me...